Jeez you actually find them that way?” Yup. The face … it’s Your face. YES! I have a little natural sculpture of YOU that’s lookin’ at me right this second.” 

So began a letter from a Boston friend whose priaptic misinterpretation of “my little man,” this pestle of mine was the beginning of this story.

Like the spirit trees in Driftwood, one sometimes finds unexpected treasures. Viktor is one of them, and he was re-positioned very carefully in my garden.

 Driftwood beach has had other Valentines with other lover’s visiting it. Upon my last visit I noted the surging appearance of two unusual males slipping ashore. It was March and like seals, that month happens to be the mating season for Rocks. And despite the second rockiest mating I have ever seen, I stayed to bear witness and later ended up by taking the injured Viktor home.

 Like the Chinook Salmon, he was rather depleted. Since then he has recovered and has become the alpha rock of my tame rockery.  As for “Jeesh’s” question, be assured I do. Moreover, he’s even more awesome when he closes his eyes. And no, Viktor is not for sale, though I do occasionally put him out to stud.  At this point Love (her real name!) advised me to put an R rating on this story or zip it entirely. 

Pressure applied – I censured the females heat. She simply was too roundly — too salacious to fit within this sheet.
The children?? — “Gosh you must have had a beautiful mother,” as my own  children were told at the grocery store one time.

I will, however print a picture of the seaward children who arrived this fall.
Sixty miles did they roll and Eleanor, bless her soul, adopted one and all.
You may ask whatever happened to the other male, Lover Square?

I kept him too, but stashed him with my neighbor Wayne for gender repair.
Viktor is a gracious rock, he is also discreet in emotion.
never tellin, what happened after he crawled out of that ocean.
But knowing both, I learned rocks have no egos, nor run for election.
In their solidity, they have reached evolutionary perfection.

I had to blank out most of the correspondent’s name, but one of them really was  ‘Love.’ Sadly some people are just too shy to admit they are rock lovers. I must further admit that my own discretion is in no small measure based upon the fact, that a more normal simulacrum of mine is precariously perched four stories above cobblestone streets. Love, do keep that windowsill shut!

I further note that rocks carry magic within — for on the very next visit I found the following rock. It had captured her own, very Scorpio’s spirit within. BTW, Viktor really loves Annie Lennox  ‘Broken Beach Glass.’

The children: 
I wanted to use them as super sized Rosary Beads, but Eleanore who was taking care of them refused to let me play with them. Mrs. Moclips neglected children were gathered up  by her and she would provide a nurturing foster home. I finally apprehended the derelict ‘Square’ father and took him home to grind off some of his edges. Both parents still live apart and rarely visit the kids but as you can see they turned out very well.

 

Do come and visit me at my new plant forum or go to my website on Rocks.
(C) Herb Senft 1995

Study how water flows in a valley stream, smoothly and freely between the rocks. Also learn from holy books and wise people. Everything – even mountains, rivers, plants and trees – should be your teacher. Morihei Ueshiba